POE: Emily Dickenson, everyone. Wow. She had a lot more energy than I expected. And those puppies – Delicious! Okay, moving on. Hey Raven, you know the difference between doing sketch comedy and writing at my desk?
RAVEN: Nevermore.
POE: In sketch comedy, the blackout means the scene is over and it’s time to move on to the next bit. With writing at my desk, the blackout means I wake up in a ditch in Baltimore wearing somebody else’s pants!
(Grim Shot. Audience groans.)
RAVEN: Nevermore.
POE: Don’t “nevermore” me, you flea bitten rat bird! I was in great distress! I was in need of immediate assistance! And pants! I was in Baltimore!
(Hearing the word “Baltimore,” the local crowd goes nuts. People love hearing their hometown name-checked. Poe holds his classic “I’m starving to death up here” look and eventually the audience is howling. Classic Poe!)
POE: Okay, We’ll be right back after these words from Mark Twain and his new Married Ladies-Only Summer Bible Camp. So, sit back, relax and choke on something soft.
(Nicky Tesla fires up his double neck electric violin and the band launches into ZZ Top’s Jesus Just Left Chicago. Poe chair-dances behind his desk as the Audience calls ahead to make sure they have a ride home.)
BLACKOUT!
BLACKOUT!
(Ah! My pants again!)
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